I woke up early this Monday morning to go run, and just like almost every other day since I've started the group, no one showed up. And being the unmodivated scaredy-cat that I am, not wanting to run alone, I went back to the room. But the morning was not a complete waste. No, it was quite nice outside this morning. The air was cool and fresh, and there were birds chirping. Also, despite my sleepiness and lack of physical endurance building, I did manage to come across twenty-one cents along the way. A dime on my way down the back stairway, eight pennies scattered on the front porch of Konover, another penny in a parking space nearby, and two more in the grass on the way back. To add to the pile was a penny I'd found some days ago, still waiting in my coat pocket to be dealt with. So I cleaned up my findings and fed them to Penguin. He was quite satisfied.
On another note...
Praise God! I got a call last night from MCC about two illustration pieces I submitted over the weekend. They both made it into the show! Totally wasn't expecting that. I remember thinking, as Adam and I left that Friday night, after handing them in, that I shouldn't have bothered. I had seen other artwork in the room that was probably being submitted, and it was all so good. And I saw the long list of other pieces entered as I wrote down my info underneath them. I was doing that self-doubt thing again, telling myself I wouldn't be suprised if I didn't even make it into the show. I'm really not good enough, I thought. How could I possibly compete with so many other artists who are probably all ten times better than me? What have I gotten myself into? And then I regretted putting anything in. Now here I am, trying to find a ride to the Opening/Awards reception for Tuesday. So yeah, PRAISE GOD!!!
Although, I'm still doing the doubt thing. Not about winning. I don't care about winning, really. But I wonder how harsh the judging was. What was the judge looking for? Technique, draftsmanship, idea, composition, execution? How much was taken into account? Did they have a gallery quota to fill? Was I one of the last choices to fill it? I was joking with Adam that the only reason I got in was because they saw an acurately drawn ear in one piece and glowing watercolor eggs in the other, both compliments of Dennis Nolan.
Dennis is one of my professors. He's always stressing the importance of being able to draw the ear the right way because there are so many artists out there who don't know how. As far as the eggs go, I had no idea how to paint them when Dennis gave us that assignment, and he showed me what colors to use and how to use them to get the right effect. I've learned a lot from him.
Still, I tend to doubt my abilities as an artist. Couldn't tell you why. But praise God! I'm in the show! I think it might be His way to encourage me and reaffirm the abilities He's gave me.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
-Psalm 139:14
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