This Too Shall Pass

The last week of school is over. The stress of getting projects done on time has been reduced to nearly nothing. There are still a couple things waiting for me after spring break, but for now I shall not think of it. Now I must focus on the spring break trip to New Orleans. I leave tomorrow at 6pm. I'll carpool with a few people, meet at New Haven, and board a coach bus. Then we'll be on the road for about a day. That's a lot of travel time! Luckily, I had my experience with a long road trip over the winter break, so I think I'll be somewhat prepared for that.

I must admit, I am nervous. I'm not sure if it's a feeling that something bad is going to happen, or just that I'm uncertain of what to expect in an entirely different part of the country, where disaster has stuck and we are the ones going to help rebuild homes. What will happen to me? Will I get to see my loved ones again after this trip? What does the Lord have planned?

I shouldn't be scared or nervous. I am in the Lord's hands. But still... the human part of me knows this is a big risk in a lot of ways. The long journey down, the work days to come, new people to meet and live with for a week, and the journey home. One week. Seven days. A lot can happen in that time frame. What, I don't know. And that is what both excites me and frightens me.

Well, if anyone reads this... not to be morbid or anything, but...

If something happens to me:

Chelsea can have my art supplies and art books.
Emily and Kaylee... Well, I guess you can have whatever you want that's left. Like my room.
I don't really have much.
Mom and Dad can have whatever artwork they want.

Adam can have my guitars and Bibles... And is left already with my heart. Oh, and whatever money I have in my bank of america account can go to you.

Any other money laying around goes to Intervarsity.

Um... Any cd's I own can be given to... whoever. Adam I guess, and then make sure they get shared with others.

This laptop I'm using right now should be returned to Uncle Mike.

Dad can distribute the rest of my junk to the family, including Mom's.

I hope everyone's praying! I need it!

Pre-Stress Downtime

Right now blogging will be my small downtime before the stress of my busy weekend kicks in.

I've been captured by a song. It's a song I've listened to multiple times. And everytime I hear it I feel somewhat emotional. It's a song by Bethany Dillon, called "Beautiful." I think it speaks to the heart of every woman. As women, we often struggle with self-worth and self-image. We want to be loved, and we want to be beautiful. But most of us think we have very little to nothing beautiful about us. Some hide behind make-up, some wear revealing clothing, some dye their hair, some wear jewelry, some stop eating... the list goes on. There are many ways in which women are driven to create a beauty the world wants, when really, there is a beauty inside each and every one of us. And no, I don't mean just the inner beauty (though that is important, too). I am talking about actual, physical, visible beauty. Every girl, every woman, is a rose. It doesn't matter if you're tall, short, skinny, fat, blond, brunette, a red-head, with green eyes, brown eyes, blue eyes, dark skin, light skin, large breasts, small breasts, round butt, flat butt, muscles, or flab. Every single woman is a beauty to be admired.

Beautiful by Beathany Dillon:

I was so unique
Now I feel skin deep
I count on the make-up to cover it all
Crying myself to sleep cause I cannot keep their attention
I thought I could be strong
But it's killing me

Does someone hear my cry?
I'm dying for new life

I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart, and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful

Sometimes I wish I was someone other than me
Fighting to make the mirror happy
Trying to find whatever is missing
Won't you help me back to glory

I want to be beautiful
Make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart, and be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
Just want to be worthy of love


You make me beautiful
You make me stand in awe
You step inside my heart, and I am amazed
I love to hear You say
Who I am is quite enough
You make me worthy of love and beautiful